Are you sleeping?

So I was all excited and thought I would write a real cool blog...but now that I am here I have nothing to say. How sad.

Tonight is night 3 of my stay alone... 2 out of 3 nights though I haven't been alone. I got both my sisters here tonight. =) We watched a movie and they are both sound asleep in the living room on couches. Which means I get my bed to myself. =) It would be okay if I didn't though.

So anyway, I don't really have anything else to tell you so I guess this blog is done.

all by my lonesome

So I told you all that I would be staying by myself cause my dad is out of town. Well tonight is the 2nd night... but really the first by myself cause my real nice sister came and stayed with me last night.

i'm doing just fine though...or atleast I was.

I had a real good day. Went to church, got real mad, got real happy, got real mad again, hung out with Mam, Lyns and played cards and then the youngest came home so I got to see her too! It was real nice!

So finally after a long time I decided I have better get home but I had to take care of the dogs first. So to entertain myself I called my aunt and chatted with her for awhile and then my cousin. After awhile I had enough and decided to come on home. However, I wanted to talk to my uncle so I called him to pass the time away and had to go get some gas so I could make it home...and this is when it all turned for the worst. =)

(All this happening while talking to my uncle)
First, the boy at the gas station stole my wallet... cause I tried to hide my driver's license. So after he was done pilfering through my walllet I finally got it back. My uncle laughing at me the whole time. Mostly because he could tell my face was turning red and he enjoyed making it worse. All the time talking to him the boy at the gas station saying. "you're blushing...what's he saying?" Which I certainly wasn't going to repeat what I was hearing from the other end. =) So then I remembered that my tire was low (even though the tire guy just checked them and said nothing was wrong) and my uncle laughing again, asking me if it was a full service station, so then I made him check my oil too. Which then he asked me if i thought it was a full service station. Ha! It wasn't like he had anything else to do. The place was dead!
Anyways, I got real embarassed on the phone and the boy at the gas station wanted to know what my uncle was saying and well...oh man. I finally had to get off the phone cause I couldn't stop laughing and smiling. My uncle is a really funny guy!

Once that was over we were just chit chatting and he was trying to scare me about staying out here and all...cause he knows where I live. Saying things like watch out for all the deer and stuff. Well then I said oh nothing bad is gonna happen and he said I should knock on wood and I was like yeah ok whatever. So I left and headed home...and barely turned off the highway and almost hit 4 deer that ran across the road. I blame the boy at the gas station. So I told him that and he just laughed at me. What real nice friends I have...don't ya think!


So that was a real long story...but kinda funny. I'm doing fine out here though. Everything is good! =)

la la lonely. =)

Love turned to hate

Truth become lies

Happiness is anger

Smiles are tears

Dreams fade to fear

Home alone...AHHAHAHAHA

Just kidding! I am quite looking forward to it actually. My dad is headed to Reno so I get some time off...from him. I got a whole list of things to take care of. =)

Let's just hope the forest doesn't eat me. =( I have yet had to stay out here by myself. It could be interesting. I just won't be going outside after dark.

I need...

I need you to open up your eyes

I need you to see the pain you are causing

I need you to make a change

not for me, but for you.

I need you to listen to your heart

I need you to ignore your mind

I need you to focus on God

not for me, but for yourself.

I need you to seek God's will

I need you to seek His direction

I need you to wake up to real life

not for me, but for you.

I need you to take a stand

I need you to overcome the hurt

I need you to be, and stay, strong

not for me, but for yourself.

I need you to know, you're not alone

I need you to see we are on your side

I need you to be honest with yourself

not for me, but for you.

I need you to do this...

not for me, but for yourself!

=) Happy to be me...again

I don't want to have to think about everything you say and wonder if you are telling me the truth.

I don't want to have to make excuses for you to make things alright.

I don't want to lay awake at night wondering if this is really what I want.

I don't want to spend most of my time aplogizing for something I don't even know I did.

I don't want to worry every day if today will be the day you decide not to love me anymore.

I don't want to have to think about how you might feel if I do something that makes me happy.

I don't want to worry about if my choices are going to be ok with you.

I don't want to think of reasons why I am who I am

I don't want to ask your permission to be friends with someone.

I don't want to.

And I won't!

So I'm not! =)

Adventure

So today I left the house around 3 pm with my dad. We took the rhino up the mountain with a big group of people. When everyone showed up we had 10 rhino's total. We went on so many trails it was crazy. Lots of fun but at times scary. Getting slapped in the face by branches and jabbed in the side...all in all it was great. My adventure led me to get dirty! We were going through some huge ruts in the road and we were doing real good until my side dropped into the rut and over we went. I had to push myself up and hold myself there until the people could help us get tipped up right. So that was our first encounter with the mud and the bank. Later on we almost did it again...I got real close to the mud again. =)
I should mention that 3/4 of the people we were with were drinking the whole time so by dark everyone was just plain crazy...and quite entertaining if I may say so. One of the older guys got his stuck and we had to wench him out and we got seperated from the rest of the group and apparently went a different way cause at some point we got back on the old guys farm and one of the other guys found us and was like where were you we thought you were lost and they were looking for us. It was funny. Everyone was safe though and no one got hurt. I just got a real bad headache is all. So I think it is off to bed for me.
We got back at 9pm...that's 6 hours... and it feels like it! I'm way tired!

I thought Abby would enjoy this story being that we didn't do anything near that crazy when we went up. =) Maybe next time. ;)

I'll try and get pictures tomorrow of my side of the rhino. =)
G'nite!

the wind =)

I love the wind.

The force, the strength, the feeling, the smell, the beauty of it all. I love fall weather!

So last night and today the wind has been crazy out here in my forest...we lost a couple trees and of course the pretty leaf free yard is well...no longer leaf free.

But, I was standing outside just a few minutes ago and I closed my eyes and just listened...all I could hear was the wind...and I felt peaceful, relaxed, calm, and alive!